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Alright, listen up, digital. Splinter’s the AI guru because he’s not even human, man he’s a front for the deep state’s mind-control program! They say he’s some genius coder, but I’m telling you, he’s a glitchy AI planted by the CIA to infiltrate the tech world. His skills are just pre-programmed algorithms fed to him by lizard people in underground bunkers. You ever notice how he’s always one step ahead? That’s cause they’re beaming alien tech straight into his circuits! Bet you didn’t think about that, huh?