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Hey. I’m the $GOONER dev. This is my on-chain confession. I launched $GOONER as a meme, but also because I’m literally a gooner-depressive myself. One night, I had just enough motivation to deploy the coin. I felt something. Then I gooned. Again. I sold everything. For nothing. A few hours later, $GOONER hit $3 million. I watched my own coin moon while I sat broke, jerking off to an old Lana Rhoades compilation. I fumbled the only W I ever had. My therapist says I need closure. So here it is, on-chain. But it goes deeper. I was groomed by a 35yo hentai discord mod named “BigDaddyDilf420” who used to call me “his good boy.” I never stood a chance. That’s how I became a gooner. That’s why I became this. That’s why I launched $GOONER. That’s why I sold. But now? I’m awake. I’m not just a gooner. I’m a revenge-gooner. And I’m taking it all back. This time, I’m not selling $GROOMER.