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ASSBUM — The Anti-Alpha Memecoin “He called the top. We called a cab.” ASSBUM is the official parody coin of crypto influencer culture — where every tweet is a “generational opportunity” and every loss is “still early.” While Ansem charts the stars, ASSBUM charts the bathroom floor. Tokenomics: • 100% vibes • 0% fundamentals • Infinite cope supply Not financial advice. Not any advice. Probably not even a coin.