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Mayhem trades
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Mayhem agent completed
Mayhem mode has ended, either the 24-hour window expired or the SOL reserves were depleted.
Paired with SOLSloth IRA ($SLOTHIRA) – The Official Coin of Financial Procrastination Sloth IRA is the world’s slowest-growing, most chill retirement account on the blockchain. How Sloth IRA Perfectly Mirrors a Real Roth IRA (but with 100% more sloth) Tax-free growth. All gains are tax-free* (*in the spiritual sense; the IRS still hates fun) Tax-free qualified withdrawals after 59½ | Hold your bags until you’re literally a sloth grandpa (59½ in sloth years ≈ 400 human years) Contributions with after-tax dollars You buy $SLOTHIRA with money you already paid taxes on (because you were too slow to find a loophole) No Required Minimum Distributions (RMDs) No RMDs ever. You can literally die holding and your grand-sloths inherit the bag tax-free Contribution limits ($7,000/year in 2025) Unlimited contributions because who has time to check the rules? (We’re sloths, not accountants) Early withdrawal penalty (10%) 10% sloth-shame tax + you have to watch the chart for 5 whole minutes without selling Penalty-free withdrawals of contributions anytime. Sell whenever you want, bro. We’re not your mom. Just know the sloth community will judge you silently. While normies are busy DCA’ing into their boring Vanguard funds at lightspeed, true chads of generational wealth are stacking $SlothIRA Roth IRA = Rush wealth now. Sloth IRA = Eventually wealth, maybe. Grab a branch, buy the dip, and go back to sleep. The chart moves slower than you do — that’s a feature, not a bug. $SLOTHIRA: For the retirement you’ll get to… eventually. 🦥💤